Boy, if you think that's exciting you're never going to get a girlfriend.

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"Boy, if you think that's exciting you're never going to get a girlfriend." you say. 

"Will you stop going on about this? I don’t need a girlfriend!" replies Chris.

"You're in your late 20's; you need to meet someone and move out so you can move on with your life."

"So what do you suggest I do?" he asks.

"I'll help you set up an online dating profile."

"I'll go and talk to my old boss, maybe he'll be able to help."

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